Our week in pictures

Although last week was tough for me, our family had a pretty good time.  Our adventures included snow tubing at a local park, a birthday party for Dr. Seuss, and N's first time skiing.  She had a blast!  Here are a few (not great quality) pics from the week.

Preschool Drama

Tonight, as N was getting ready for her bath, I heard her shriek, "You're not my friend and I'm going to kick you in the face."  Based on her tone, she was mad as hell at her father and she said it to be mean.  I ran into the hallway, scooped her up, and put her in the time out corner so everyone could calm down.  I was so mad at this display of anger from her.  Where did she learn such horrible words and when did she learn how to be mean?

After she calmed herself, I sat down with N and asked who used those words. She instantly shared the name of one of her classmates and based on what I've seen from this little girl at after school, I believe her.  She then proceeded to tell me how the same girl won't play with her anymore and said they weren't friends.  Apparently, N responded with a "well, you're not my friend either" comment. For reference, N is 3 and the other girl is 4.  Seriously?!? When did preschool become filled with drama?

N and I had a long discussion about using nice words and not mean words.  She told me all about how some girls won't play with her friends and it's clear that there's some exclusion happening.  We talked about the importance of playing with everyone and making good choices.  She seems to understand, but I'm sure in the thick of things at school, it will be hard to remember.  Any guidance on how I should proceed?  I'm at a loss here...

The Topic of Dieting

Over the weekend, N and I were at a play date with one of her friends. We were over at the friend's house with her mother and father who are amazing Italian cooks. Both parents were born in Italy and have been in the US for since grad school and they’re known in our kids’ friend circle for making amazing meals. They fixed lunch for everyone and when we sat down to eat, seemed surprised by my choices. The parents made a salad with olive oil and vinegar, a bacon spinach quiche, pasta with tomato sauce, and rolls. They also served wine – at lunch. I brought these massive red velvet cupcakes from Costco for dessert because I didn’t have time to bake and I thought they were festive.

I chose a small piece of quiche, half of a roll and a large portion of the salad, with just the vinegar as dressing. No wine for me (I can’t drink and then work out), which was very shocking to them and caused the obligatory “Come on, live a little!” statement. Despite the peer pressure, I abstained.

I decided to have half of a cupcake for dessert. I work out hard and I do so because I like sweets. I never avoid dessert. This was also shocking to the parents. The mother made a comment about how she guessed I could handle having a cupcake because of my size, but she couldn’t.

The lunch conversation then turned to the topic of diets, which I really detest. My child and two other impressionable young girls were at the table. I don’t use the word diet in my house. I talk to my child about how I make good choices and I work out to stay healthy. When I was little, my mom was always on a diet and I know that impacted my view of food, my body, and my image. I don’t want that to rub off on N. I’ve made good choices so that N doesn’t feel that pressure from me as she grows up. The dreaded 4-letter D word came up though.

I’ve pondered the fact that in a few years, N’s friends will start talking about diets. When that time comes, I’m planning to focus my response around fueling and taking care of our bodies and being strong women. I know there will be peer pressure, but I feel as equipped as possible to help her through it – when she’s a little older. I never imagined that the topic would come up so early though. She’s 3 years old…I don’t want her thinking about this now.

We went home and after her nap, I asked N to help me make dinner. I talked to her about what we were cooking and shared how it was a balanced meal, full of protein and good carbs to give us energy and help her grow. For dessert, she had one piece of chocolate and thoroughly enjoyed it. She didn’t ask for more because she was full and satisfied. The topic of dieting hasn’t come up since and hopefully, it won’t for a while.

Bye-bye, Baby Fat

Tonight, while rubbing lotion into my daughter's sensitive skin, I noticed something.  The fat rolls on her wrists are no longer there. N was an adorably rotund baby and I was so proud of the rolls that my body created. She was a bottomless pit for her entire first year.  At her demand, I woke multiple times each night to feed her until she was nearly a year old.  I didn't mind because I could see the result of my sleepless nights...that sweet, sweet baby chub.

The creases in her wrists were the last evidence of those delicious rolls and now they're gone.  My baby has turned into a little girl in what feels like an instant.

So, I put N to bed, went in my room, and cried. I know it sounds self-centered, but it's sad to realize there's no more evidence that she was dependent upon me.  She has become her own little human being; a healthy, growing, active little girl.  I know it's all good stuff, but it's still a little sad.

Womp-womp.